By: Muhamad Umar Zafar

Edited By: Eric Omorogieva

On the night of the second presidential debate, when Trump talked about terrorism and Afghanistan, an exchange student from Southern Italy asked me, “What is the difference between the USA and Pakistan?” I replied, “There is no difference because there is no comparison,” which is what I have felt since I first stepped foot on this land. The first thing that blew my mind was the color of the sky, it was blue, and no I am not joking. For some who are from Lahore, it is a luxury to have a view of a clear sky and not smog enveloping the whole city. When I sent my friends pictures back home, their responses were the same, “everything there is in HD.”

Thanks to the soft power the U.S. has deployed through its entertainment, the agitated and suppressed teens of Pakistan often forget that the American lifestyle they are fond of and look forward to is in fact scripted, and many lose themselves in the perfect life of rom coms. I too was one of them. For years I longed to come to the US and live a dream life. I was too naive to realize that my dream life was inspired by the likes of Friends, The Big Bang Theory and She is All That. However, the reality is not a cinema, there are complications and consequences to deal with.

The land of freedom, democracy, and opportunities are the slogans of the brand of the U.S. That is what I was told my whole life, which is surprising considering the rising anti-American sentiment in Pakistan in the last two decades. Frequent drone attacks in the FATA and surrounding regions are one of the primary reasons behind descent towards America.

And yet, people there prefer the USA when they want to shift their life around. This shows the efficiency of American soft power. Even after having so many innocent civilians killed in drone attacks, locals in Pakistan still think of moving to America. They have left such an impact on the general population that they are willing to compromise on their patriotism in the hope of a future shown in Hollywood.

Back home, getting admitted to an American university is not as big of an achievement as getting approved for a US visa. If you happen to be from the lower or middle class, then friends,family, and the whole village hold feasts for what you have achieved, the visa. Now you are not just any Pakistani, you are a Pakistani with an American Visa, a ticket of hope for your family and village. You are not a Rupee anymore, but a dollar, 280 times better than a Pakistani, as per the current exchange rate. At times out of respect or out of jealousy, people will start calling you “Amreeki babu” which translates to American Gentleman. And just like that, you will be an outcast before you have even left the country.

Ironically, the biggest cultural shock I got in the US was that the homeless in Washington, D.C. look more homeless than the homeless in Pakistan. Primarily because the homeless here are not only struggling with homelessness but with something far more serious, loneliness. They are all on their own, alone. Unlike in DC, homeless people in Lahore live in joint families. It has its drawbacks indeed, but at least they are not alone. Partly, because of having a family to take care of, they tend to avoid falling into a narcotics trap. Alternatively, here as per my observation, narcotics addiction is prevalent in the homeless community. They have no one to talk to, so I hear them talking to themselves.

As America is a hyper-individualistic society, people prioritize their privacy and personal space. Perhaps for that reason, people do not like to sit in the metro if one seat is taken. They would prefer standing rather than sharing the seat. Maybe they prefer their personal space more than the strain on their legs, the comfort of being alone as compared to the comfort of sitting down. In Pakistan, I’ve seen people fighting for a seat. They come from the narrative of “paisa halal karna” which translates to “value for money.” However, here people have grown out of it because of a better life standard. Everyone has AirPods on and their eyes are stuck to their phones. Kids younger than 7 have smart phones in their hands, they talk to Siri more than their mothers.

In this land of freedom and expression, on the first day of my orientation, we were told to take precautions by avoiding eye contact from strangers. It was advised that we do not stay out late at night and put headsets on but do not listen to any music on it so we know what is happening around us. I understand and appreciate that the school warned us about these things, otherwise someone like me from South Asia would have not thought about this cultural norm. However, it was surprising that things are so bad in Washington, D.C., the capital of the USA. I expected it to be safer than it is. Initially I thought that it was dystopian, not to be able to make eye contact but now I have come to understand the reasoning. It’s better to look at things in cultural relativism and respect the local norms and traditions.